I miss my Claire :(

I counted the days until your vacation
for two months, like little capsules in a jar.
I held my breath and waited
and tried not to scare or scold.
Then the day arrived.
Your daddy knocked on our door.
I handed you over like a loaf of bread
with your bags and told you to "be good."
You, my blonde bubble,
my life's precarious gift.

I never exhaled.
Suddenly, your bed is vacant.
I walk slowly.
Like a ghost, I drift.
Lost without your squeaky demands,
searching for my beating heart,
I count the days like capsules in a jar.